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In Space no one can Hear you Poot by Ben These long duration suits bring up another issue, sanitation. In Mecha Musings, I discuss the reality of the Gundam universe, and to be honest, I don't know many people who can "hold it" for the entire flight from Earth to the space colonies. Mobile suit cockpits are small, confining spaces, and since they are designed to operate without the use of a specialized suit if need be, they don't have… ehem.. tubes, either. Now this is nothing new. Pilots of modern fighter aircrafts suffer the same problem. They primary difference is the time. Normally, a fighter jet is never gone for more than one hour's time. If there is going to be a longer flight, in 90% of cases an autopilot and some kind of lavatory is available, but in a mobile suit, none of these functions exist. They are, for all intent and purposes, war machines with no other intentions. So in space, on a 15 hour flight, how do pilots like Kira Yamato and Heero Yuy keep from soiling their pants? To be honest, I wish I had a technical explanation I could back up, but I don't. Instead, I'm going to speculate. Idea # 1 – A seat switch. A small switch on the control system opens the cockpit chair and turns it into a lavatory similar to those found on passenger aircraft. The Good: pilot never needs to get up, waste can get immediately removed from the suit. The Bad: waste can get immediately removed from the suit, and since the cockpit is located in the lower torso, the most likely way and shortest path out is directly to the back of the suit. Don't ever say a mobile suit can't walk in and cut the cheese. Idea # 2 – The Trucker's Restroom. As with some semi trucks, the mobile suit might have a small hidden compartment which could be accessed by completely swiveling the cockpit chair, that might contain a portable lavatory. This is a lot more likely in bulky mobile armors than toothpick like suits like most Gundams however. Idea # 3 – Enzymes. Just as natural solutions can be used to help induce people to have to go, the same can be done to resist that urge and help keep the body from metabolizing food quickly. A person could slow down their metabolism significantly this way, however extended use of such a system would eventually lead to excessive fatigue, if not a fatality for lack of nourishment. It would explain why Gundam pilots stay so stick figure thin to match their mobile suits. And last but not least, Idea #4 – They Don't. I am not going to say anything further on this one except… it doesn't matter if the seat is up or down. That's it for this week, and everyone remember, if you're ever in a mobile suit, wear clean underwear.
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