Full Metal PanicReviews

Full Metal Panic? Fumoffu! Ep. 5: Hard Sell Fetish/Patient of Darkness


Chidori and Sousuke read an announcement the latter wrote about incidents of attempted assault by a masher within the schools. Chidori tells Sousuke to simplify it because it reads like a mission briefing. At night, Kyoko gets attacked by a person wearing a horse mask and gets her hair forcefully tied into a ponytail. Chidori tries to submit a report to the local police and gets approached by officer Wakana Yoko, who’s researching the masher. She estimates his next attack location and asks Chidori to be the bait under threat of being arrested. Feeling guilty for causing Yoko to get demoted, Chidori decides to go and Sousuke offers to cover her. To conceal his identity, Sousuke dons the Bonta-kun costume, now modified into a power suit. At the location, Sousuke tails Chidori and accidentally steps in front of Yoko. Mistaking him for the culprit, Yoko zaps him with a taser. Sousuke recovers and they start shooting rubber bullets at each other, oblivious to Chidori’s cries as she is chased by the real masher. Sousuke and Yoko start fighting with stun batons and Yoko knocks Sousuke down into a lower path. She tosses a trash can at him and they both shoot at each other just as Chidori runs through. The masher stumbles over the can and gets hit by both bullets. After clearing up the confusion, Yoko arrests the masher who was just a man obsessed with ponytails.

Chidori and her friends try to scare Sousuke with a ghost story but he doesn’t flinch, so Chidori decides to take him to an abandoned hospital that’s rumored to be haunted. Kyoko backs out because she’s too scared to go. Once there Mizuki freaks out and says she saw an old lady staring at them from a window but no one believes her, so she chickens out and leaves. Chidori thinks Mizuki was trying to spook them, but Sousuke confirms that he saw the old lady as well. As they explore the hospital, Chidori sees a child peeking from behind a corner and screams, but Sousuke’s calm demeanor annoys her even more. They enter an empty office and a phone starts to ring. Sousuke dislodges the receiver from afar and tries to answer, but all he and Chidori hear are people screaming. They pass several spooky phenomena, including a girl covered in blood, but Sousuke is as stiff as ever, much to Chidori’s anger. As Chidori approaches the girl, the floor gives way and she tumbles to the floor below. Sousuke emerges from the rubble and runs towards Chidori. They discover that the splatter of blood behind her was just red paint and Yoshiki and a bunch of kids with a man show up. The kids explain that they did all the ghost tricks to scare people away from the hospital because the man, Gen, lives in it. When Chidori asks about the old lady, the kids don’t know about her and Gen explains that she’s probably a ghost of a patient who died in the hospital fire ten years ago. Chidori faints and Sousuke carries her out of the hospital along with the kids who ran out in fear. It turns out the old lady was Gen’s mother and they’ve both been living in the hospital since his father, the hospital director, died. When Chidori wakes up, she asks Sousuke if he was scared when he thought she was injured. Sousuke faintly replies with a yes and Chidori teasingly asks him to repeat what he said.


Here we see the return of Wakana Yoko, who’s been demoted to a desk job after trying to stop Sousuke and Chidori’s joyride back in episode 2B. With that maniacal streak she has, you have to wonder how she made it into the force in the first place. It was pretty fun watching her fight on equal footing with the modified Bonta-kun. I only wished the second part of this episode continued the good streak, because it was pretty stupid. I don’t know why Chidori devoted so much time and energy trying to scare Sousuke when all she had to do was pretend to be in danger. Sousuke’s seen more than enough horrors on the battlefield, so what’s a bunch of silly Scooby Doo-style shenanigans compared to that? On another note, Yoshiki from episode 1B makes a short appearance here.

Overall Rating

Full Metal Panic? Fumoffu! Info

Yasuhiro Takemoto

Fumihiko Shimo
Shoji Gatoh
Yasuhiro Takemoto

Mechanical Designer:

Character Designer:
Osamu Horiuchi

Musical Composer:
Toshihiko Sahashi

12 episodes

Japan 08.25.2003 – 11.18.2003


Comments are closed.